There’s no playbook for becoming a dad.
You read the books, you think you’re ready, and then reality hits, and suddenly all the “best practices” go out the window.
What surprised me most wasn’t how much my life changed at home. It was how much I changed at work.
You Can’t Out-Process Growth
When my daughter was born, I treated parenting like a project plan.
I built schedules, routines, “optimization strategies.” None of it worked.
She didn’t care about my process. She cared that I showed up.
That I was there, patient, and present.
It turns out, that’s exactly what most people need at work too.
You can’t manage someone into maturity. You guide them. You create space for growth. You stay consistent.
Good managers don’t force progress. They create the environment where progress happens.
Empathy Over Efficiency
Before kids, I was all about output. Hit the number. Close the renewal. Keep the machine running.
And there I was, I met 3am, holding a crying baby who didn’t care how logical I was. That experience built a muscle I didn’t know I needed: patience.
Now, when a teammate misses a target or a customer gets frustrated, I pause.
I ask why.
I listen before I fix.
Empathy isn’t just a soft-skill. It’s smart. It builds trust, and trust builds teams.
The Power of Small Wins
Parenthood redefines success. Some days, victory is just getting out the door with both shoes on. That perspective followed me into management.
Now I celebrate the micro-wins:
- A customer who re-engages after going silent.
- A CSM who tries a new idea.
- A process that finally clicks.
Those moments build momentum. And momentum builds culture.
The Big Picture
Fatherhood humbled me. It reminded me that real leadership isn’t about control. It’s about influence and inspiration. It’s not about being right, it’s about being present.
At work, that means giving people room to try, fail, learn, and grow. It means remembering that everyone is figuring out life, just like I am.
I don’t have all the answers. But I do know this:
Being a father made me a better manager because it made me more human.
It taught me to lead with love, patience, and perspective. The same things that make a family thrive make teams thrive too.
Robert Statsky 